A fellow entrepreneur confided in me earlier this week that, while she was determined to remain optimistic, she was experiencing doubts about her two year old startup.  If you can relate, this post will ask you the same simple question I asked her that should instantly dispell your fear and doubts, or at least make you realize you have stronger emotions that far outweigh them. But first, let me assure you that uncertainty is the only certainty in a startup and with uncertainty comes fear and doubt.  So what you are feeling is not only normal, its a mandatory part of the startup experience.  Startups are often referred to as roller coaster rides because they are full of high-highs and low-lows.  So if you want to know if you have what it takes to be an entrepreneur one of the most important questions to ask yourself is do you have the high tolerance, and stomach, for risk?  (no, that’s not the question that will help you overcome fear and doubt, keep reading).

So what’s the one question that will instantly make you overcome your fear and doubt and help you deal with the uncertainty of your startup dream?  The answer actually comes from an unlikely character, the lead singer of Kiss, Gene Simmons, in a now famous NRP interview he did in 2002 with Fresh Air’s Terry Gross that you can listen to here. The reason the interview is famous is because Gene is extremely obnoxious throughout the entire thing.  At the end, Terry asks him if the persona he presented on the show was not the real Gene Simmons, but just one he effected as a member of Kiss as no one could possible be “that deeply into themselves.”  Gene’s response was “I think everybody should be [deeply into themselves]….life is too short to have anything but delusional notions about yourself, which is, you should really like yourself more than you deserve to because….” and this is where the big question comes in “….what’s the alternative?”

When my friend the entrepreneur confider her doubt in me, I instantly thought of that interview with Gene Simmons and asked her “what’s the alternative, to give up on your dream and get a job?”  If you are truly and entrepreneur, that one question should repel you to such a degree that you will instantly overcome your fear and doubt and continue on with your mission, as giving up and getting a “real job” is just about the worst possible ending for any true entrepreneur.

If you think I’m nuts introducing Gene Simmons into a conversation about startups, let’s look at Union Square Ventures’ partner and AVC author Fred Wilson’s opinion on what are the “unique and defining characteristics of entrepreneurs” from his post on the subject in February of this year:

“And I also believe that there are “unique and defining characteristics of entrepreneurs.” Here are some of the ones I observe most frequently:

1) A stubborn belief in one’s self

2) A confidence bordering on arrogance

3) A desire to accept risk and ambiguity, and the ability to live with them”

So as fear and doubt creep up as you go about your day-to-day, simply ask yourself “what’s the alternative?” and you will quickly put down those demons and continue on with your mission.  God speed!

Update: My wise friend Nate Westheimer, whom I interviewed here a few week ago, added a thought to this post worth sharing and expanding on, so here it is:

“My issue is that it’s smart sometimes to “give up.” Sometimes we’re wrong, you know? In fact, we’re wrong a lot. So the question I’d ask someone who’s two years in and stagnating is: what radical thing will you try with your business before you close up shop?

I couldn’t agree more with Nate. My post assumes that you have a solid product and market, because if you don’t you should definitely fess up and bag it to find a bigger, better idea to pursue. In the case of the entrepreneur in this post, I believe the product is solid.  Her challenge is that she made some early decisions that cost her too much precious time.  But a few of us are helping her get her back on track to see if the product is as solid in the market as we think it is.

Thanks to Nate for chiming in and reminding us to think big and radical and also of Kenny Rogers’ advice that you need to “know when to hold’em, know when to walk away and know when to run!”

A month ago we found out that my nephew Bryan, who was born a week before my 16 month old son Christian, has a brain tumor.

Nothing in this world can give you perspective like staring death straight in the eye.  It makes you see the big picture really quickly and realize that you can be “here one day and gone the next.”  My perfectly healthy cousin Michael literally got run over by a bus in Philadelphia not even a year ago and was announced dead on arrival.

I share these incredibly personal and tragic stories because I hope that some good can come from them. Yes, I hope you appreciate life more. Yes, I hope you live today as if it were your last. But I also hope you are inspired to take a chance on yourself. I can’t help but think how many dreams and good ideas never get realized and how many would be entrepreneurs never made because they lacked the courage to take the plunge.  If that describes you then I  hope these stories help give you the courage to make a run for your dreams.  It doesn’t matter how old you are or how many bills you have there is never a better time to go for it than right now.   I am living proof of that!

A few weeks ago I announced here on this blog that I am leaving the company I helped build from 5 to 110 people and 0 to 7M monthly users for the past five years, at the end of March to start another Internet software company.  A lot of people think I am nuts to leave such an amazing team just as all our hard work was starting to pay off, right as the company is poised to make a run for the #1 spot in its category.  Add to that a rather hefty mortgage on an apartment in Manhattan, a 16 month old baby with plans for another and the fact that my wife left her VP job 17 months ago to be a full time mom.  In most people’s opinion this is the exact wrong time for me to be taking a risk and starting another company.  But this is all I have ever dreaming about doing for as long as I can remember. I started my first business when I was 16 and had three people over the age of 30 working for me. Ok, for like a minute I majored in finance in college because I thought I wanted to be Gordon Gekko after seeing Wall Street, but I got over that really quickly and have started a few other businesses since then.  A month ago “they” started making me question if I was indeed nuts. But then I was coming out of my health club while an older gentleman in his 70’s was coming in and I thought to myself, when I am his age I want to look back and say I went for it. I don’t want to be spending my golden years wondering “what if.”  No matter what the outcome, I want my kids and grand kids to know I had the balls to try and they should too.

Ben Franklin said “if you have your health you have everything”.  When Beatles drummer George Harrison died of Cancer in 2001 I remember thinking even a billionaire can’t pay his way out of death and no amount of money can save your when your number is up.   So for all you would be entrepreneurs out there, what are you waiting for? The longer you wait the harder it will be, so there is never going to be a better time than right now. Tomorrow might be too late.

If anyone else has a story about what made them take the leap and start a company that you think would inspire others please share in the comments.

Our VP, Engineering sent the below New York Times post around internally yesterday (thanks Daniele) and I thought it was spot-on, especially since it was directly from the mouth of someone in the trenches.

Bottom line, don’t underestimate the power of happy employees to drive productivity and/or unhappy employees to derail the entire company! That’s why you hear the term “happy, productive employees” and almost never hear “unhappy, productive employees”.  The former go together like peanut butter and jelly and the later are as about as compatible as Jerry Seinfeld and Bill Gates.

We have had a “hire slow, fire fast” policy for years, but it is a lot easier said than done. We do a pretty good job on the hire slow side, with every candidate interviewing with several people including most of senior management and the direct team with which they will be working.  When it comes to firing fast, however, there are so many things that make the policy very hard to live by, from the emotional drama involved to the time and resources invested in that person (sunk costs) and what you will have to pour into finding and training the next one. But you are not doing anyone any favors keeping an unhappy employee or waiting for them to quit.  We have lived to regret it every single time and can tell you that one bad apple does indeed spoil the whole bunch!  You can offset the emotional issue a little if you give them a healthy severance, but you are never going to make it emotional free for either party. Deal with it and deal with it quickly and decisively. Think of it like a band-aid – you have to pull it off fast so you can get the initial sting over with and everyone can start to heal.

The Secret to Having Happy Employees

About 10 years ago I was having my annual holiday party, and my niece had come with her newly minted M.B.A. boyfriend. As he looked around the room, he noted that my employees seemed happy. I told him that I thought they were.

Then, figuring I would take his new degree for a test drive, I asked him how he thought I did that. “I’m sure you treat them well,” he replied.

“That’s half of it,” I said. “Do you know what the other half is?”

He didn’t have the answer, and neither have the many other people that I have told this story. So what is the answer? I fired the unhappy people. People usually laugh at this point. I wish I were kidding.

I’m not. I have learned the long, hard and frustrating way that as a manager you cannot make everyone happy. You can try, you can listen, you can solve some problems, you can try some more. Good management requires training, counseling and patience, but there comes a point when you are robbing the business of precious time and energy.

Don’t get me wrong. This doesn’t happen a lot. There’s no joy in the act of firing someone. And it’s not always the employee’s fault — there are many bad bosses out there. Bad management can make a good employee dysfunctional. On the other hand, good management will not always make a dysfunctional employee good. And sometimes people who would be great employees somewhere else just don’t fit your company, whether it is the type of business or the company culture.

In the worst cases, the problem of a bad fit can have a bigger impact than just one employee’s performance. Being in charge does not necessarily mean you are in control, and being in control does not necessarily mean being in charge. Have you ever seen a company or department paralyzed by someone who is unhappy and wants to take hostages? It is remarkable how much damage one person can do. If you haven’t seen it, I suggest you watch “The Caine Mutiny.” Basically, one guy takes apart the ship. He was unhappy. It only takes one.

This is only my opinion. I don’t have a Ph.D., an M.B.A., or even an economics degree. What I do have is a happy company. And that makes me happy. Now I know some people argue that business is about making money, and not everyone has to be happy. That is also an opinion. Everyone has a right to his or her opinion. When you own a company, you also have the right to surround yourself with the people you choose.

Read the full post on the New York Times here